Monday, June 18, 2012

an update that's brief and concise...ish

So... I've been intending to write something here for a while now, but whenever I started to do so, couldn't think of what to write.  Not that there's nothing to talk about.  The question is HOW to briefly and concisely describe everything that has been happening in my life and heart!
A lot of changes have taken place lately.  I'm no longer working at Camp.  God said it was time to move on to something new... I have known that for a year, but just recently has it actually been the exact time that needed to happen.  May 25 was my last day of working - and living - at Camp.  That was a very difficult decision to make, even though I knew it was the right one.  Camp and the people I lived and worked with there became very, very dear to me.  Let's just say that the goodbyes were not pretty!!  But on the other hand, in spite of all the heartache and tears and "oh-my-goodness-what-am-I-doing-I-can't-do-this," those last few days were precious days, in a way.  I felt so loved and embraced by my Camp family, through the words they spoke, prayers they prayed, and gifts they gave.  Those people, that ministry, and the season of life I spent serving at Camp, will always have a special place in my heart!
One day last week, I went back up to Camp to visit and hang out for the afternoon.  I wasn't sure how it would feel to be back (considering how hard it was to leave!), and it was a strange feeling, but not necessarily a bad one.  When I left, one of the camp pastors told me, "It's like sticking your finger in the ocean" -- everything keeps right on moving, like you were never there.  It was good to see everything still moving right along at Camp, and to have the feeling that, even though I miss it, that's not my place anymore.  And that's okay.
So, on to what's next, right?  Whatever that is!  :-)  For now, I have moved back in with my family, and am spending the summer doing ministry work (Vacation Bible School, inner-city outreach camp, etc) and mission trips.  In less than a month, I'll be traveling to Kenya and then on to Romania, to be out of the country for almost four weeks.  I'm very excited and nervous about that!
As I pursue these opportunities this summer, I'm seeking and praying that the Lord gives me direction on what's next.  I've applied for a few ministry jobs, and "waiting and seeing" now.  It's a kinda scary place to be... not just financially because I don't have an income anymore, but also in wondering, what am I going to do with life from this point on?  I don't want to be stuck in a place of feeling like I'm wasting the days.  I absolutely want this season of life, and the next, to count for something good for God's kingdom and glory.  I think He will honor that... I just have to be patient while waiting on Him to reveal His plan.  AND I have to be diligent to seek Him every day, right now, while I'm waiting, and allow Him to be doing His work in my heart and life.

So there's the sort-of-brief, sort-of-concise life update from Ashley!  ;-)  I hope to start writing regularly again now...

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